My Life Begins Now

People say life begins at 40. Honestly, I don’t know what they mean by that and I guess it will take time for me to understand. I am 15 years away from it anyway. I just hope that when I reach that age, I have accomplished most of the things I want to accomplish and have secured the dreams and ambitions I am currently struggling for.

But what do I really struggle for? What do I want to accomplish? Who is the person I want to become? All these things must be answered right now. As I define this silver age, which is by the way my self-imposed deadline for quarter-life crisis, am I really heading towards the right path?

I believe I am not the only yuppie who asks this question to himself. There are many of us who have been experiencing or about to experience the confusing tides of life and career decision-making. In this busy world where Facebook, Twitter and Google suddenly become parts of our daily lives, it’s difficult to clear-out our minds for a self-recollection and deeper introspection. We are all jaded by the things around us.

It’s about time to make time for ourselves. Procrastinating something life-changing is delaying our fate and purpose.

First of all, I never dreamed of becoming an accountant or anything business-like. My interest ranges from history, to science, to literature, to music, to geography, to law and to politics. I am always fascinated by the things and facts from the past, people who made names in the past, the who’s who of the present, the power of the written word, the magic of music to the heart and soul, the beauty of the earth, the thick volumes of law books and legal briefs, and the wilderness of our government. I don’t like math and anything dealing with numbers and logic. So I find it really weird - how did I come to be in this direction?

During college, while some of my classmates dreamt of becoming a CPA-Lawyer, I dreamt of becoming a writer doing auditing and consulting works on the side. I want my degree to be demoted to a hobby while promoting my hobby (writing) to a higher level. Waking up every morning relaxed, sipping a cup of coffee while reading or writing at the terrace of my dream country house is what I call “life”. I wanted my ideas, principles, goals and objectives work for me rather than I working for other people’s ideas, principles, goals and objectives. I don’t exactly want to be the boss. I want to be that tiny little voice behind every rational boss’s directives.

Ironically, it’s far different from the life I have now. I start each day in a rush. My life is a made up of “quickies” - Quick shower, quick breakfast, quick lunch or even worse a working lunch, quick nap (if I can afford one) and quick sleeps. The only activity that’s quite lengthy is having project update meetings (thanks to my Boss and to the principle that audit planning is a continuous process).

One might say I should be proud of those quickies because it means I have a job worth devoting time and effort. Partly true. Because aside from gaining some pounds on my journey towards “stardom”, I began to lose contacts and unknowingly lose some friends and acquaintances along the way. I missed numerous barkada get-aways, birthday parties, weddings, reunion meetings and more and more get together events. Since then, the number of invites I receive diminished. They might be thinking “Why waste one peso to text Jay and invite him for an upcoming event which he’ll surely decline due to his busy schedule?” or “He cannot make it anyway so why bother?”. It’s really regretful and embarrassing. Had I have given the power and freedom of my “life”, all those things wouldn’t have happened.

I searched for green pastures to feed my mouth and provide shelter to my family. In short, I need to live, survive and satisfy our family’s needs. Survival necessitates some sacrifices because we can never serve two masters at the same time. But little did we know that too much dependency on our “masters” makes our life complex and unhappy. That unhappiness turns into monstrous craving for more wealth, fame and power. And more wealth, fame and power. The insatiability blurs our vision.

Of course, I always wanted to be rich. We all want to afford the best things money can buy. It’s now just a question of how rich you do want to become, which leads to another question of the ways and means of achieving it. Bill Gates made it through Microsoft, Warren Buffett made it happen through investments and Michael Jordan managed to pull it through by slam dunks.

So, how can a son of a bitch like this author carve his own piece of wealth and success?

By doing what I love to do and loving what I do.

If you ask what Bill Gates, Warren Buffett and Michael Jordan and all other self-made men have in common, they’ll probably tell you that they just do what they love to do. Doing what we love to do eliminates the need to worry about work at all. Through loving what we do, we exude a self-secure, positive, hardworking, and generally successful person without even knowing it. People will start to notice and admire you. They will patronize your product which in turn will boost your profit. And through continuous repetition, will make you rich than ever! It’s constant. It’s like inertia – it shall continue to move unless an opposite and stopping force interrupts.

Getting rich is an anticipated outcome of the process called “poverty”. Without poverty, one cannot define affluence. Now, I can understand why I was born neither a Rockefeller nor a Vanderbilt.

What do I love to do? My answer is “I love to do these things I am doing right now. Right this very moment. I have just discovered that my life must be spent on something I am created for and which aligns to my purpose. God has given me an amazing brain power and wonderful talents that I should utilize and improve to the full extent. I must use these things to excel and give meaning to my existence.”

Is it wrong to aim for the top posts? Is it a burden on someone if I want to be a President and CEO of a company giving directions, caring for my people and serving the public at large? Would you laugh if I tell you that I want to be the billionaire next door? Of course not, because those ambitions were too common.

Too common that most of them just let go of their grand dream to pursue another dream and begin their lives anew. They decided to give up chasing their dreams and create a lesser and easier goals. And before they knew it, it’s too late. Life has no U-turns. It’s a one-way ticket.

So, their lives begin at 40. My life begins now.